|
I'M A SENIOR CITIZEN
I'm the life of the party ... even when it lasts until 8 PM.
I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.
I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am
going.
I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go.
I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you're saying.
I'm very good at telling stories ... over and over and over and
over.
I'm aware other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine.

I'm so cared for: long-term care, eye care, private
care, dental care.
I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds,
children and politicians.
I'm positive I did housework correctly before my mate retired.
I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place.
I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.
I'm having trouble remembering simple words like........

I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies.
I'm anti-everything: anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise, anti-inflammatory.
I'm walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less.
I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days.
I'm in the initial stage of my golden years: SS, CD's, IRA'S,
AARP.
I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I
be alive at 150?

|